I've been taking care of The Jaffers for the last week, and I mean the whole week. By the time that the weekend arrived I was about to hit everybody against the wall to have a little bit of order in my house. Good think I didn't do it. :) But seriously, between them and my kids I was thinking about the bad mom that I am and the ways I should improve. Of course everybody has lost their tempter once in a while, but in my case...well you see it's very clear in my patriarcal blessing that I have pacience as a gift, but it's also ovbious that I CAN'T FIND IT. It's supposed to be easier for me at least that is what I thought until last Sunday. Brother Jaffers was giving a talk about patience and it was one of those times when you just have to pick up all that you can because I was really needing that talk (especially because that day I was also taking care of one of the Jaffers). Anyway, I felt much better after his talk because as I said in my patriarcal blessing it said that patience is one of my gifts. I though that would mean that I just have it. I didn't have to fight for it or anything like that. But man I was wrong...again. I finally know that patience is something that I still need to work on and improve. It will be my challenge. I guess taking care of the Jaffers or my kids or anybody kids, or holding on with my husband's schedule, or living in this place, or waiting for a better time in life, or learning the language, or improving in my calling all this and more requires LOTS OF PATIENCE. Now I know I'm not the best and I still have lots to improve, and I'm still looking for my patience, but at least I know that somewere inside of me it does exist, and it will help me through all my life.
To improve this gift that I have I'll try to be more postive in my daily duties. I'll try to focus on all the blessings that I do have and not on the blessings that I'm waiting for. They will come with time. Now that doesn't mean that I'm going to be perfect, but at least I'm going to do my best to try and improve my patience. Perhaps sometime soon I'll find it.
5 comments:
I think it's one of the hardest things to learn to be happy where we are in life. I know I've struggled thinking, "I'll be happy when..." But the problem with that is that life is never perfect. There will always be something better to look forward to but by constantly waiting and looking forward we really miss out on the happy and wonderful things of the present.
You are a wonderful mom! Taking care of your own kids, and extra kids, being the wife of a med student, living in another country, speaking a foreign language are all really hard things! So don't be so hard on yourself, Claudia, because you are awesome! And I admire the ways that you look to improve yourself. If you find your patience will you let me know where it was? I could really use some myself!:)
I have always noticed you have a great deal of patience! We all have days or experiences that push us a little more. We don't always like how we reacted to events, but we sure can learn from them and do better. Your children and husband know that you love them. They love you for all you do. We see our children flustered and we help them. I believe our children know when we too are flustered and give us a little extra love...not always at the moment we need it. You are a great mother. I know Taylin always feels like a very special child after coming home from your care.
I'm realizing with this pregnancy that I have absolutely NO PATIENCE!! I'm sure your better then I am. REgardless, taking care of other people's kids, much less your own, always tests people's patience
Claudia,
You are Super Mom!!! I totally understand running out of patience though. Sometimes there is a limit that all of us reach. We can only stretch ourselves so far. Don't overdo it and just remember that you really are a wonderful, even if you do run out of patience once in a while
Claudia -
You are a great writer! You crack me up! I love that you "have" patience, you just can't "find" it. I don't think many of us can find it, especially right when the kids are crying, the food is burning, and the phone is ringing. Its easy to find when we are alone, reading a book on our bed, with no one around to bother us. Then we seem to be FULL of patience!! Keep writing! I love it!
Sherri
Post a Comment