Nicky's first day of school..

..or should I write Nicky's nightmare first day of school?
While I was trying to adjust I had to confess it wasn't an easy task to do. Unfortunately my kids sometimes had to pay the consequences of this transition. On Nicky's first day of school I  had to try everything ready so she wouldn't be late.
Managing 4 kids didn't look that hard after all. It was 7:00 a.m. and we all were ready. Hanna a little grumpy and poor Zach had no idea what was going on. However this was something that we all had to get used to so we start the day with tons of Patience and love. The day before I convince Nicky to use a hand me down pair of crocks that she got. She didn't want it very much but I convinced her by telling her that Daddy wears his to work and he loves them because they are super comfy. Nicky accept using the crocks for first day of school.
We left from home around 7:10 that gave us perfect timing to be there with tons of time (since Nicky's class starts at 7:45) I forgot how crazy it get to park so I decided to park as close as I could from school.  I didn't bring my double stroller and even though Zach was too little he has always been a big boy. So I held him. Then the struggle. My toddler princess was demeaning to be held and Ian was running around all those cars. Nicky was complaining about something and I look at the time IT WAS ALREADY 7:30 We weren't going to make it on time (since I had to park practically a block away from our home) I couldn't hear anymore complains since everybody was pretty much up sad. I told Nicky to pose for the picture but my tone was already about to explode. I think Nicky noticed that I was having a hard time so she immediately obeyed and stop complaing. She noticed that her siblings were all around the street  and didn't want me to get up sad. I took the picture and we ran to her school. Gosh the step mother (that is how I call my bad mother side) came out of me with in minutes. Shouting at Ian and pulling Hanna's hand. I kept yelling at Nicky like it was her fault (oh stupid step mother) My friend Celest was coming back from dropping off her girls and saw me struggling with my gang. She immediately offer to take care of my troubles makers (Ian and Hanna) while I was going to drop off Nicky. I told her that perhaps they wouldn't want. But I was being so bad that they didn't hesitance to say YES WE WILL GO WITH CELEST. I thank her a thousand times. I took a deep breath and held Nicky's hand. This should be a very good experience for kids FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL. I was making it a nightmare for my cutie. So I started to talk with a soft voice. When Nicky noticed that she started sobbing. I wasn't yet in the mood to be patienct again so I rolled my eyes and asked her with a sweet voice and force smile...NOW WHAT? and with her cute voice she told me MOM YOU SAID THIS SHOES WERE COMFORTABLE AND THEY ARE MAKING ME BLEED!! (she got a blister from not wearing sucks) I felt to bad that I gave her a hug, apologise and told her that I was going to ask for a bandit..and so I did.
I'm not the best mom, I'm not super mom and I haven't found the patient that I need. However I'm trying, after all that is why we are here right? to be better :s. I love my kids with all my heart and yes I might yell too much some times...not that I'm proud about it. Adjusting wasn't easy. Little by little I'm going back to track. I do admire some of my friends and family who are so patient with out spoiling their kids. I'm hoping someday be like them. I'm trying though. I tryed to compensate the day to my kids by being super kind most of the day. Here is Nicky coming out of school.

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